


from home

by kuntenjohnil



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, this is my very first attempt at angst tho pls don't expect too much from me sobs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:48:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27587699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuntenjohnil/pseuds/kuntenjohnil
Summary: Johnny and Taeil were trapped in an arranged marriage set by their families, and they decided to accept their family's decision because they wanted to make their parents happy. Both of them also decided to become good friends when they're married to each other so that everything could go smoothly with no problem.But a problem then came one day when they accidentally met Taeil's ex, and everything suddenly changed between Johnny and Taeil.
Relationships: Moon Taeil/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 8
Kudos: 99
Collections: NCT Bigbang Round 1





	from home

**Author's Note:**

> This work was written for NCT Bigbang Round 1! Hope you enjoy this one!

It was just like the usual afternoons at The Moon’s household.

The birds were chirping. A gentle breeze was shifting in between the leaves. The sun was shining bright, but it wasn’t scorching hot. Mr. Moon was sipping his usual green tea, accompanied with some dumplings as snacks.

One thing that’s different was the attendance of his only son, Moon Taeil, sitting on the chair next to him, tension visible on his expression.

“Taeil-ah.”

Taeil looked at his dad, “Yes, appa?”

“You know what your eomma told me five years ago before she passed away?”

Taeil shook his head lightly.

“She asked me to make sure that you won’t live alone when both of us are not around anymore.”

Taeil tried so, so hard to resist the urge to roll his eyes.

_ Here we go again. _

“Appa.”

Mr. Moon put his cup carefully back on the table in between them, “Hm?”

“You’ve known me for all the thirty years that I’ve lived right?”

“Yes, son.”

“And I spent half of them living alone in Seoul to study and work.”

“Yes.”

“Don’t you think I am capable enough to live alone?”

Mr. Moon smiled slightly, “I believe you are more than capable of surviving on your own, son.”

Taeil frowned.

“Then what was the point of what you said just now, appa?”

Mr. Moon sipped on his tea again.

“But don’t you think it will be better for you to have someone to live with, someone to come back to at the end of the day, someone to spend your old days with, someone who will take care of you?”

_ Someone who will take care of me? What if I am the one taking care of them instead? _

_ Psh. _

“Appa.”

“Hm?”

“You know I am still not interested in girls right?”

“And who said that you have to spend the rest of your life with a girl?” Mr. Moon gave Taeil a soft look, “Both your eomma and I are okay with that. As long as you’re not alone, son.”

“Can I find a housemate or a roommate instead?”

“And what if your roommate or housemate gets married and leaves you alone at the end?”

Taeil sighed.

“Okay. What is your plan, appa?”

Mr. Moon smiled triumphantly upon listening to Taeil’s question. He knew that he only needed to give one small push so that his son would agree to his idea.

“So, there is this good friend of mine…”

Taeil’s eyes widened.

_ Hold up. _

_ Don’t tell me- _

“...and his son just came back here from studying in America…”

_ No no no- _

“...so I want you to meet him and get to know him.”

_ Shit. _

“Appa, are you.... trying to set me up with your friend’s son?”

Mr. Moon looked at his son and gave him his signature wide smile, “What do you think?”

Taeil looked at him back in disbelief, “No offense but I think it is a bad, bad idea, appa.”

Mr. Moon’s smile didn’t even waver for a bit, “Really? But you haven’t met him though?”

“Setting me up, with whomever that is, is already a bad idea, appa. What makes you think that I would agree to that?”

“Well, I actually don’t expect you to agree right away, son,” Mr. Moon shrugged, “But I am not asking you to get married to him like, tomorrow or something. You can get to know him first. Befriend him.”

“But, appa… the intention is already there. I can’t just befriend him when I know that I am going to get married to him at the end!”

“Okay, what if we have a deal?” Mr. Moon shifted his chair so that he was fully facing Taeil, “Five dates. Five dates is all I ask. If you think you can’t be with him, or you want to only stay as friends with him even, then that’s it. I am not going to bother you anymore.”

_ Oh. _

_ That’s… a good deal, kinda? _

“Five dates, right?”

Mr. Moon smiled seeing that his son was, pretty much, convinced by his proposition, “Yes. Five dates.”

Taeil was quiet for a while before he finally nodded.

“Okay. Five dates then.”

  
  


_____

  
  


_ Cafe date. _

_ How cliche. _

Taeil sipped on his chamomile tea. The tea was very much needed to calm himself down since it was D-day when he met the son of his father’s friend.

D minus 10 minutes to be more exact.

Taeil decided to come early because, well, no matter how much he hated his father’s idea, he still had to be nice to this poor guy. The problem with Taeil is that, when he hates something, it would be super obviously seen on his facial expression, so he followed his father’s advice to come early to ‘set his mood’ and ‘school his expression better’.

_ Thanks for knowing your son very well, dad. _

“Hi! Moon Taeil-ssi, right?” A friendly voice suddenly broke Taeil’s reverie.

And that voice came from a tall, good looking young man.

_ Wait. _

_ A guy this handsome is still single? _

“Hello? Taeil-ssi? Are you alright?”

“Oh, y-yeah, sorry… yeah, I am Moon Taeil. Johnny Suh-ssi...?”

The man gave Taeil a dazzling smile and offered his hand, “Yes, the one and only! Nice to meet you, Taeil-ssi!”

Johnny quickly sat down on the seat in front of Taeil right after he shook Taeil’s hand, and he suddenly pointed at the almost-empty cup of chamomile tea, “Oh god, you almost finished your tea, was I late? I am so sorry that I was late!”

Taeil offered an assuring smile, “No no you’re not, don’t worry, I actually came here pretty early, that’s why I almost finished my tea.”

Johnny let out a relieved sigh, “Great to know then! I’d like to order some coffee, let me order you another cup of tea then? Or would you want another drink to have?”

“Another cup of chamomile would be great, thank you, Johnny-ssi.”

“No problem! I’ll be right back!”

Five minutes later, Johnny came back with a tray full of pastries, as well as a cup of hot americano and another cup of chamomile tea for Taeil.

“The pastries looked amazing and I couldn’t resist! I hope you like croissants?”

Taeil couldn’t help but smile again, “Yes, I love croissants. Thanks a lot!”

Johnny sat down on his seat again and let out a small sigh, “Oh well, so… I assume you’ve heard from your father?”

Taeil gave a tight smile and nodded, “Yup. And I assume you too?”

Johnny nodded as well, “Yeah. Both my parents think that I need to finally settle down since I am now back here in Korea. Since I haven’t been in a relationship for the past… five years, I guess? Yeah, five years, they think that I am incapable of finding my own partner, and they decided to introduce me to you,” Johnny sipped on his coffee, “What about you, Taeil-ssi?”

Taeil shrugged, “Well, more or less the same reason, I guess? My mom passed away quite some time ago, and my dad is afraid that I’ll live alone for the rest of my life, so… yeah, and the rest was history.”

Johnny nodded understandingly, “If I may ask you Taeil-ssi, what do you think about marriage?”

Taeil chewed on a small piece of croissant, while at the same time contemplating whether he’d tell Johnny the whole truth or not, “Actually… it is not in my agenda, and I don’t think it will be in the future.”

Johnny gave a relieved smile, “Honestly, me too. I never thought of myself as someone who would settle down, both now and in the future.”

Taeil smiled as well, “Glad we’re on the same page.”

“I am honestly very glad too, Taeil-ssi,” Johnny laughed lightly, “I was a little scared that I wouldn’t be able to meet your expectation if you actually wanted to get married and settle down.”

They were quiet for a while, before Taeil broke the silence.

“So… did your parents promise you five dates with me, or is it just my dad’s deal with me?”

Johnny laughed, “Oh god, really? Your dad promised you five dates and he’ll back off?”

Taeil blushed, “Y-yeah…”

Johnny smiled and shook his head lightly, “I see that you really are opposed to the idea, huh?”

Taeil shyly nodded, “Then what about you? What made you agree to… this?”

“Well,” Johnny smiled fondly, “My parents are getting older, and they pretty much already gave and did everything for me since when I was little, even until now, but they never asked for anything from me. They never asked for me to have great grades when I was in school, they never asked for money or anything to buy when I started working, they never asked for anything at all until… this. So I was thinking, why don’t I make them happy for once? After all, they just want the best for me, right?”

Taeil suddenly felt like he was slapped with reality.

His parents have always been very accepting of him, even since the very beginning. They gave him the warmest hugs when he came out to them for the very first time, they allowed him to move to Seoul to study and work, they always checked on him to ensure that he was healthy and happy…

_...so why don’t I make them happy for once? _

“Johnny-ssi.”

Johnny stopped chewing his croissant, “Hm?”

“What if… we make a deal?”

  
  


_____

  
  


Taeil went back to Mr. Moon’s house that evening, and although his father tried his best to sound nonchalant when he asked Taeil about his date, Taeil knew so,  _ so _ well that his father was waiting for a positive answer very expectantly.

So a positive answer was what he gave.

“Well, he’s nice, and he’s handsome too. We are going to meet again for a movie next week.”

The wide smile on his father’s face and the sparkles on his eyes, he wouldn’t be able to forget them even if he tried.

The sparkles were even brighter when he told him one month later that he was finally in a relationship with Johnny.

But was he, really?

Let’s go back to the cafe date they had the very first time.

_ “What kind of deal, Taeil-ssi?” _

_ “So… you said that you have no plan to get married in the future, and me neither.” _

_ “Okay…?” _

_ “And you want to make your parents happy?” _

_ “Yes, of course.” _

_ “So… I have a plan. Of course you can disagree with this if you find this… nonsensical and all that.” _

_ “It’s okay, I am not a judgmental person. Shoot away.” _

_ “What if… we just follow what our parents want… but as friends?” _

_ “......sorry Taeil-ssi, I think I don’t get what you mean.” _

_ “Uhm, so… our parents want us to get married, right… what if, we just follow what they want, but we just live our lives as… housemates kind of sort?” _

_ “Wait… you mean like, we get married, we live together, but with no feelings involved whatsoever?” _

_ “Y-yeah…” _

_ “Hmmmmm…” _

_ “And let’s say, if you want to be in a relationship with someone in the future, then you can still be… just let me know if you do so that I can cover up your relationship from our parents. We can also get divorced if you want to get married to them, just in case.” _

_ “Hmmmm…” _

_ “W-well, of course you can have some time to think first, you can also disagree with this, I won’t mind…” _

_ “I agree, Taeil-ssi.” _

_ “E-excuse me..?” _

_ “I think it’s a good idea. I’m in.” _

So they had a deal.

Of course they couldn’t just ask their parents for a hand in marriage, like, right away, or else their parents would be suspicious. Since everything had to be realistic, they went on dates, they took pictures together, they went to have dinners with each other’s parents…

...and they finally got married a year later.

  
  


_____

  
  


Getting married as friends, with no feelings involved whatsoever, apparently is not as bad as what people think.

Well, at least that was the case for Johnny and Taeil.

They managed to act like a loving couple with tear-jerking marriage vows during their wedding, and they also had managed to live together without any fuss for the past two months. They stayed in the same room and slept on the same bed (since their parents knew the password to their apartment and they didn’t want to risk their parents barging in and seeing them not sleeping on the same bed), but, of course, nothing happened. They lived in tandem like roommates, with them taking turns to cook and prepare meals, washing, and cleaning duties, and they even shopped for their groceries together. 

“Taeil-hyung.”

Taeil stopped stirring the soup in the pot, “Yes, John?”

“Mark just sent me a reminder, the potluck party at Doyoung’s house is tomorrow night.”

Taeil slapped his forehead, “Oh god… yeah, now I remember. We haven’t even decided on what to bring for the potluck!”

Johnny sat on their kitchen island, “Let’s just bring something easy to cook and prepare, hmmm… what about shakshouka, hyung? We can buy lots of eggs and tomatoes, then toast some baguettes. It will be pretty quick, I guess?”

“Oh yeah, good idea. Doyoung is a vegetarian, so he can have it as well... Are you free this afternoon? Maybe we can go to the supermarket together to get the ingredients?”

Johnny nodded, “Yeah, I am pretty much free today, hyung. We can go there after lunch?”

Taeil suddenly remembered his soup after Johnny mentioned lunch, so he went back to stirring again, “Yeah, we’ll go there after lunch then!”

Taeil and Johnny were at the spice aisle, discussing whether to make the tomato sauce of their shakshouka take the Italian route by having oregano, basil and thyme, or keep it Mediterranean by having cumin, cayenne, and nutmeg, when suddenly Taeil felt a light pat on his shoulder.

He turned around, and his facial expression just completely changed.

“Taeil-hyung! Hello! I can’t believe that I would meet you here!”

Taeil gradually paled.

“H-hi Jaehyun, long time no see… how are you?”

“I am good, hyung! I heard that you’re married now? Congratulations!” this Jaehyun guy shook Taeil’s hand, “Soooo, you don’t want to introduce me to your husband?”

“O-oh…” for a second, Taeil suddenly forgot about Johnny, who had been frowning after seeing Taeil’s not-so-good expression, “Jaehyun, this is Johnny, my husband… Johnny, this is Jaehyun, my…”   
“I am Taeil-hyung’s ex! But don’t worry, the history between us was like, a long, long time ago, and we haven’t been in contact with each other since we broke up!” Jaehyun shook Johnny’s hand in a friendly manner while Johnny was still in a slightly shocked state upon listening to Jaehyun’s explanation.

“You know what hyung, I was really happy when I heard from Hyuck that you’ve gotten married! It’s really great to know that you’ve finally moved on from me!”

Taeil stayed quiet.

“Oh, I have to go, hyung! It was really nice to meet you, and you too, Johnny-ssi! See you around!”

And with that, Jaehyun left just as quickly as he came.

“Hyung,” Johnny touched Taeil’s arm lightly, “Are you okay? You look… pale. Do you want to go home?”

Taeil looked up, and Johnny could see that his eyes had become teary.

“Yes, please.”

  
  


_____

  
  


Living with Taeil for two months had helped Johnny in knowing Taeil better, including his different moods.

Throughout the whole two months, Johnny had never seen Taeil this broken, sad, and zoned out.

Right after they came back from the supermarket, Taeil went into the bathroom and spent quite a long time there. Johnny was worried, so he decided to press his ear to the bathroom door.

And he heard some crying noises.

Taeil spent around half an hour inside of the bathroom, and he came out with red, swollen eyes. When Johnny asked why his eyes were red and swollen, Taeil said that there was something in his eyes and he rubbed it too hard, that’s why they were red and swollen.

That didn’t explain the red nose though.

Sadly, this went on for days. Taeil tended to zone out, and he rarely smiled. Johnny even often saw him shedding some stray tears, although it was obvious that Taeil tried so hard to hide it from Johnny.

_ This can’t go on forever. _

Johnny finally decided to do some intervention.

“Taeil hyung?” Johnny called from their bedroom.

Silence.

“Hyung? Are you okay?”

Another silence.

Johnny finally stood up and came closer to the bathroom, “Hyung? Are you okay?”

“O-oh.... yeah Johnny, I am okay.” Taeil answered with a raspy voice.

_ He must be crying again. _

“Can we talk? Please?”

There was a pregnant pause before Taeil finally answered, “Y-yeah, sure… wait a minute…”

Five minutes later, Taeil emerged from the bathroom and he sat down on their bed. As usual, his eyes were swollen and red, as well as his nose.

“Hyung,” Johnny let out a sigh, “I know we got married because of a deal, and we might be very, very different from other couples out there… but we’ve known each other for more than a year, and living together somehow also brought us closer than before, don’t you think so?”

Taeil frowned, but he nodded.

“And because of that, I know there is something wrong with you, especially after we got back from the supermarket a few days ago. I know you’re trying to hide it, but I can see that you’ve been crying. You don’t really smile either nowadays, and you also tend to zone out,” Johnny held Taeil’s hand, “Hyung, although we’re married not because of love, but I care about you, and I don’t like seeing you like this. Is it okay if you tell me what made you like this?”

Taeil didn’t answer, but he abruptly sobbed loudly, like he finally managed to let out the huge burden that had been bugging him for a long, long time. Johnny came closer to Taeil and slowly brought Taeil’s body into his arms. He rubbed Taeil’s back, hoping that he could give Taeil some comfort, even just a little.

They stayed quiet for a while until Taeil’s sobs finally subsided.

“Jaehyun was my first love,” Taeil suddenly said, “My relationship with him was the only relationship that I have ever had… and he is the reason why I don’t want to get married.”

Johnny hummed.

“I-I love him, Johnny, I still do… but he loves someone else.”

“Did he… did he cheat on you?”

Taeil shook his head, “He didn’t, but we broke up because he told me that he fell in love with someone else, and he didn’t want to lie to me… I respect that though, it is actually better than, let’s say, him telling me about it when he was already in a relationship with the person he fell in love with.”

Johnny hummed again. His hand was still rubbing Taeil’s back.

“But the person… the person he fell in love with, was someone much, much better than I am, Johnny… he’s more sociable, he had a better job, he is… he is everything that I am not.”

Johnny frowned.

“It’s been three years since we broke up, and I thought I’ve moved on… but meeting him a few days ago just… brought out all emotions, and it was like day one again,” Taeil hiccuped, “I suddenly remembered all memories that I had with him, all the good ones… and I even thought, if only I was as good as the person that he fell in love with, maybe I could still be with him, maybe I would still be able to have more good memories with him…”

Tears were streaming down Taeil’s face uncontrollably.

“Or maybe I just don’t deserve to be loved.”

Johnny just hugged Taeil even tighter.

  
  


_____

  
  
  


Johnny was still stirring his coffee when Taeyong slipped into the seat in front of him, “I sacrificed my lunch break and I haven’t even finished my data entry that has to be submitted by the end of the day, so this better be important, Johnny Suh.”

“It’s Taeil hyung.”

Taeyong’s eyes suddenly softened. He always got a soft spot for his best friend’s husband after all, “Why? What happened to Taeil hyung? What did you do?”

Johnny’s eyes widened after listening to Taeyong’s accusation, “I didn’t do anything! It was his ex!”

Taeyong’s eyes hardened again, “Okay, so which one is his ex? Who do we have to kill?”

“We are not going to kill anyone, Taeyongie,” Johnny rolled his eyes, “So we accidentally met his ex when we were grocery shopping, and… apparently he hasn’t moved on from his ex.”

“Oh gosh… really? Was he the one who made him not want to get married?”

Johnny nodded, “And yesterday he told everything to me, he actually let his ex go because his ex fell in love with someone else… but what broke my heart was what he said at the end.”

Taeyong stayed quiet, waiting for what Johnny was about to say next.

“He even said that he doesn’t deserve to be loved.”

Taeyong gasped, “Oh no… Illie hyung…”

“I was really sad after he said that, Yongie, like… Taeil hyung is one of the loveliest people I’ve ever met, he is sweet, kind, caring… why did he think of himself like that?”

“Johnny,” Taeyong said, “You care about him right?”

Johnny nodded quickly, “I do! I really care about him, a lot!”

“Oh?” Taeyong looked like he just realized something, then he smiled secretively, “You care about him? A lot?”

“Yes, I really do!”

“Then show him,” Taeyong said again, “Show him that you do. It will make him feel better, for sure.”

Johnny stayed quiet for a while, then he finally nodded.

“Yes, I will. Because he really deserves to be loved.”

  
  


______

  
  


Taeil raised his eyebrows.

_ Cupcakes? _

Taeil opened the box on the kitchen island and found six cupcakes inside of it, topped with salted caramel sauce, chocolate shavings, blueberries, strawberry jam, cinnamon sugar, and oreo.

All of his favorite toppings.

_ Is there any special occasion that I accidentally forgot…? _

Taeil quickly checked the calendar in his phone and he frowned.

_ No special occasion though…? _

Taeil put his phone back into his pocket and sighed.

It’s been a month since that night when Taeil finally told Johnny about Jaehyun, and Taeil already felt so,  _ so  _ much better. He even already returned to his usual cheery self.

But Johnny still spoiled him rotten.

Taeil and Johnny usually took turns cooking their dinners and their agreement was the one who cooks can cook whatever they want, including their favorites, and the other would just follow. However, lately Johnny had been cooking all of Taeil’s favorites, and when Taeil asked him why he didn’t cook his favorites instead, Johnny just shrugged and said that he came to love Taeil’s favorites too.

As if he didn’t cry and sweat buckets eating Taeil’s favorite super spicy stir fried glass noodles and even unconsciously swore that he wouldn’t eat nor cook it again.

But he still cooked it for Taeil three days later.

Johnny even suddenly came up with little surprises everyday for Taeil like a bear keychain, a new mousepad, scarf in Taeil’s favorite color.

And now cupcakes from his favorite bakery and with his favorite toppings.

He knew Johnny meant well with all these. Heck, he even told Taeil himself that he cared about him.

But he was not as fragile as Johnny thought.

Taeil sighed again.

_ Johnny is a really good man. _

_ Too bad that he has to be stuck with me. _

  
  


_____

  
  


“...egg drop soup?”

Taeil nodded, “Yes. You like egg drop soup right?”

Johnny nodded uncertainly, “Yes…? But I remember that you don’t like it, right?”

Taeil shrugged, “It’s okay, I guess egg drop soup is not so bad!” He had a spoonful of it, and he even hummed for the sake of proving his point.

Johnny smiled.

He knew Taeil was trying to give back what he had done for the past month.

“Thank you, hyung.”

Taeil looked up from his bowl, and he smiled back, “Thank you for letting me have my favorite foods even during your turn to cook, Johnny! You’re not fooling anyone~”

Johnny chuckled, “I just want to make you feel better, hyung.”

Taeil’s smile softened, “Thank you John, but don’t worry, I am not a glass doll. I will survive.”

Johnny was stunned for a second before he returned the smile again, “Yes, I know you’re strong.”

There was silence before Taeil finally spoke again, “Oh! Doyoung told me that he wanted to see that newly opened art gallery in town, but he had no friend to go with. Can you maybe accompany him this weekend, John?”

Johnny frowned, “Me? Why me? Why not you, hyung?”

Taeil waved his hand, “No no no, art galleries make me sleepy! And I checked their schedule, they have a photo exhibition this weekend, and you like photography right? So maybe it is more suitable for you… I guess?”

Johnny hummed, “Yeah, okay then. I will go,” Johnny sipped on his water, “But can you drop me off and fetch me when I’m done, hyung?”

Taeil frowned, “Why don’t you just take the car with you, just in case you guys want to have a meal after or something? I will only stay home this weekend anyway.”

Johnny whined, “That’s the thing, hyung! You don’t have anything to do, right? Then you can send and fetch me later! And it’s difficult to find parking on weekends!” Johnny pouted, “Please…?”

Taeil chuckled, “Okay okay, you big baby. Are you happy now?”

Johnny grinned widely and nodded, “Happy!”

  
  


_____

  
  


“Johnny hyung.”

“Hm?”

“I’m not sure if you realized it, but Taeil-hyung is trying to set us up.”

Johnny’s eyes widened.

This is definitely not something that he expected to hear when he was right in front of a photograph of a love letter torn in two.

“Taeil-hyung? Setting us up?” Johnny’s voice cracked, “But… why?”

“Honestly? I am not sure. He didn’t tell me anything, I just… felt it,” Doyoung sighed, “But the last time we talked, he kept on saying about how nice you are, how come you’re still single - although technically you are not now - then how come I am still single… so I just put two and two together.”

Johnny hummed, “I… I see…”

Doyoung patted Johnny’s back, “I know it must be kind of heartbreaking for you when you are in love with Taeil hyung, but trust me, he is actually in love with you too.”

Johnny whipped his head so fast Doyoung was scared for a second that he would break his neck. 

“W-what? How did you know?”

“Hm? How did I know about what? About you being in love with Taeil hyung or Taeil hyung being in love with you?”

“Errr… both?”

Doyoung chuckled, “It is either me being too observant or you two are the most obvious humans on the planet,” Doyoung patted Johnny’s back again, “I saw the way you looked at Taeil hyung this morning when he dropped you off, hyung. You didn’t look at him like that when Taeil hyung introduced us for the first time. And the way you insisted that Taeil hyung has to pick you up later? Come on hyung, you are such an independent guy. You either drive your car, or go everywhere by subway on your own. Since when did you get this whiny and even ask Taeil hyung to drive all the way from your house and pick you up, hm?”

Doyoung only laughed when Johnny pushed his shoulder and sulked.

“But don’t worry hyung, Taeil hyung is in love with you too.”

Johnny raised his eyebrows. 

“But… he is setting us up? Where is the logic, Doyoung-ah?”

“I’ve known Taeil hyung for years. He is one of the most selfless people that I’ve ever met in my whole life. When he loves someone, he wants that person to be happy, even though he has to sacrifice his own happiness.” Doyoung let out another sigh, “That is also why he was suffering after he broke up with Jaehyun. He was still very much in love with him, but didn’t want to be in the way of Jaehyun’s happiness. He knows that the person that Jaehyun fell in love with would make him happy, that’s why… he just let him go.”

Johnny was quiet for a while, “But… I still don’t get it, Doyoung-ah. No offense but… why did he set me up with you?”

Doyoung smiled softly, “Taeil hyung always wondered if getting married with him would actually hinder you from meeting someone new, someone that you might fall in love with. I am sure he repeatedly told you and convinced you to go every time your colleagues or your friends have any meetups or outings, right?” Johnny nodded repeatedly, “Yeah, that is because he wants you to meet people, and he wants you to have fun, hyung. He doesn’t want you to be… not happy just because you’re married to him.”

“But… I am happy,” Johnny said exasperatedly, “I am now the happiest I’ve ever been, Doyoung-ah. He really… he makes me happy.”

Doyoung smiled again, “I know, and I am really happy for that too,” His smile suddenly dimmed, “Taeil hyung… he doesn’t know how to love himself. He always tries his best to make people around him happy, but he doesn’t even know how to make himself happy… he always says that he doesn’t deserve to be loved. I don’t mean to boast about myself, but he keeps on saying that I am such a nice friend to him, and I deserve to be happy. So, to answer your question, I guess he is trying to set us up because he knows that I will be a good match for you, hyung?”

Johnny let out a big sigh, “Why… just why is he doing it to himself?”

Doyoung patted Johnny’s shoulder, “That is why you have to tell him. Tell him what you feel. Tell him how he makes you feel. I hope he’ll understand.”

Johnny smiled thinly, “Thanks, Doyoung-ah. I am glad Taeil hyung has you as his best friend.”

Doyoung smiled back, “I am glad he is my best friend too, hyung.”

  
  


_____

  
  
  


**illie hyung**

Doyoung ah

**doie**

Yes hyung?

**illie hyung**

Did something happen at the art gallery?

**doie**

Hm? 

Nothing unusual hyung? 

We just saw the pictures then commented here and there thats all

Why?

**illie hyung**

Johnny had been quiet since he came back

I am worried

**doie**

Maybe you can ask him?

I am sure he’ll be okay with that

**illie hyung**

Hmmmm

Yeah I guess I’ll ask him

Thanks Doie

**doie**

Anytime hyung!

Taeil sat himself next to Johnny on their bed, “John…”

“Hmm?”

“When you said that we’ve been close and I can tell you anything… you know that it applies to you too, right? You know you can tell me anything as well, John.”

Johnny looked at Taeil intensely, “Anything, hyung?”

Taeil nodded, “Yes, anything. You’ve been quiet since you came back from the art gallery, John. Anything happened?”

Johnny was quiet for a while before he said softly, “Are you trying to set me up with Doyoung?”

Taeil looked taken aback, “E-eh? Why did you say that, Johnny?”

“Are you or are you not, hyung?”

Taeil looked down, then said quietly, “Y-yes…”

Johnny sighed, “Why did you do that?”

“I-I am not exactly setting you up with Doyoung, John, but I was just…” Taeil looked like he was lost for words, “Maybe if you see how amazing Doyoung is for you, then you can open your heart for him?”

“Then why Doyoung?”

“O-of course it is not only limited to Doyoung... “ It was Taeil’s turn to sigh, “I just don’t want our marriage to be in the way of you getting the love of your life, John. You know that we already made an agreement at the beginning that we can meet anyone else and we’ll just divorce when any of us meets the one, right?”

Johnny sat closer to Taeil, “What if the love of my life has been in front of me all along, hyung?”

Taeil was taken aback once again.

“Wait, w-what are you trying to say, John?”

John held Taeil’s hand softly, “What if… what if I tell you that I am in love with you?”

Taeil didn’t answer.

Instead, he directly went up and said softly before he left the room, “I am sorry, Johnny.”

Taeil didn’t come back home that night.

  
  


______

  
  
  


Taeil and Johnny suddenly started living like strangers.

It was really obvious that Taeil was trying to avoid him. He left for work before Johnny woke up, and he only returned home late at night when Johnny was ready for bed. He usually went back home during his lunch break when Johnny was at the office to prepare their dinner during his turn to cook, and he would put a note on their fridge that Johnny only needed to reheat them later.

Those sticky notes were the only way for them to communicate these days.

And to say that Johnny was heartbroken was an understatement. He cried himself to sleep right after Taeil left their room, and he even called in sick for three days.

He never felt like this before, not even when he broke up with his exes.

On day four, he finally decided to message Taeil. Whether Taeil’s gonna read it or not, that would be another story.

**johnny**

Hyung, I am really sorry for telling you that I am in love with you

Honestly it kinda hurts that we are being strangers now

If you don’t feel the same way

Is it okay if we come back like how things used to be?

I promise my feelings for you won’t change anything between us

I will try my best to make it go away

Just

I miss you hyung

Johnny put his phone face down and was about to try to get back to work before his phone pinged once.

**taeil hyung**

We’ll talk when we’re home

  
  


_____

  
  


For the first time in three days, Taeil finally arrived home earlier than Johnny. He even prepared one cup of coffee for Johnny and one cup of green tea for himself on the coffee table when Johnny arrived.

“Do you want to change into more comfortable clothes first before we talk, John?” Taeil asked softly.

Johnny only shook his head when he put his satchel bag on the sofa, “No hyung, it will be better if we talk first and get over with it.”

Taeil smiled thinly and nodded.

Johnny walked towards the sofa and sat next to Taeil, “So… what are we going to talk about?” Johnny asked nervously.

Taeil exhaled, “Since… when?”

Johnny looked at Taeil confusedly.

“Since when did you… fall in love with me?”

Johnny let out a soft ‘oh’ before answering, “Honestly, it was only recently, hyung.”

Taeil hummed understandingly, “And how did you realize that?”

“It actually started when you told me about your ex, hyung.” Johnny held Taeil’s hand, “I was really taken aback when you said that you don’t deserve to be loved because, if anything, a sweet and lovable person like you deserves all the love in this world, hyung! So that’s why I decided to show you that you deserve to be loved.”

Taeil chuckled, “Is that why you decided to buy me nice stuff and cook me my favorite foods?”

Johnny nodded, “Yeah, so that was my first intention. I actually only wanted to show that you deserve to be loved, but after some time, it started to feel different…”

Taeil looked at Johnny, “Different as in…?”

Johnny looked back at Taeil more intensely, “At first, my intention was ‘I want to make you happy’ hyung, but then after some time… it changed to ‘I want to be happy with you’.”

Taeil was at loss for words.

“And that’s when I realized that I’ve fallen for you, hyung.”

Taeil looked into Johnny’s eyes, and he saw nothing but the truth and sincerity there.

He sighed.

“But it’s okay hyung, I will do my best to make this feeling go away, as long as we can go back to how we were before-“

“Johnny,” Taeil interrupted all of sudden, “I am… I am in love with you too.”

Johnny’s eyes widened, “Wait… for real, hyung?”

Taeil nodded.

“Then, that night… why did you leave? Why were you avoiding me?”

“I am sorry Johnny,” Taeil said after letting out a huge sigh, “I was actually trying to comprehend… all this.”

Johnny frowned, “Wait, I don’t get it… what’s there to comprehend?”

“Johnny, listen to me,” Taeil held Johnny’s hand, “My breakup with Jaehyun… it really took a toll on my self esteem. I always think that I will never be good enough for anyone and everyone will leave at the end, that is why I don’t want to get married, because it will break me if someone just… leaves at the end.”

Johnny only nodded understandingly, encouraging Taeil to continue his story.

“And when I realized that I fell for you, while we agreed at the beginning that there would be no feelings involved whatsoever… that’s when I realized that I was doomed,” Taeil started to wipe a single tear escaping his eye, “I am not supposed to feel that way because I thought you didn’t feel the same… then I started thinking that someone as great and amazing as you really deserves someone better, someone who really understands you, who can take care of you…”

“Hyung, hyung,” Johnny interrupted softly, “Please, please never, ever think that way. I didn’t get the chance to tell you that night, but I’ve never felt as strongly as how I am feeling now with someone else before, not even with my exes… and that night when you left me? I was broken, hyung. Trust me, I never felt like that before. And if my heart decided to choose you, if my heart decided to fall for you, then what can I do about it?”

“But Johnny… you haven’t met anyone else after you got married to me, who knows that you’ll find someone better, someone else that you’ll fall for…”

“Hyung, you always asked me to join whatever meetups that my friends organized, right?” Taeil nodded, “Then why didn’t I really enjoy them? Why do I always want to go back home early and spend time with you instead? Why do I always wait for the time to come back home because I can’t wait to meet you?”

Taeil was speechless.

“Hyung, please… let me love you. Let me show you that you deserve to be loved. Please, hyung…” Johnny begged.

Taeil cried harder, but he finally came into Johnny’s arms and hugged him, “Okay Johnny, okay...” Taeil sobbed, “Thank you for loving me John, thank you… I love you…”

Johnny gave a teary smile, then he kissed the top of Taeil’s head, “I love you too, hyung, I love you…”

  
  


_____

  
  


“So,” Doyoung stirred his coffee, “Can I say now that the both of you are married for real?”

Taeil blushed, meanwhile Johnny just grinned widely, “Yeah, you can say so.” Johnny answered.

“Then what changed after you got married though? I mean from what I saw, you both had been very close and pretty cuddly since the beginning, so…”

Both Taeil and Johnny didn’t answer, but the blush on Taeil’s cheeks got even darker.

Doyoung gave a disgusted face, “Holy shit, no no no don’t answer that, don’t answer that please! Forget that I asked! I can’t believe that I asked you both such a question, now the imagery of the both of you… oh god…”

“Hi Johnny, hi Taeil hyung,” Taeyong suddenly arrived and interrupted Doyoung’s rant, “Sorry I am late, the traffic was crazy!”

Johnny unconsciously released a relieved sigh, “It’s okay, Yongie! Have a seat!”

Taeyong sat on the seat next to Doyoung. After he had a good look on Doyoung’s face, he suddenly smiled widely, “Hello, I am Taeyong, Johnny’s childhood friend! And you?”

“O-oh, I am Doyoung, I have been Taeil hyung’s friend since college, so… yeah…” Doyoung blushed slightly as he was taken aback by Taeyong’s smile.

Both Taeil and Johnny raised their eyebrows and then looked at each other.

_ This is going to be interesting…. _

  
  


* * *

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading my work till the end! Special shoutout to Aknes for the art and the prompt, as well as Isis for being my lovely beta!  
> Comments and kudos would keep me going and would be greatly appreciated, thank you again! Oh and you can always scream about johnil with me @kuntenjohnil on twitter and cc!


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